Image copyright © 2024 Haley McTavish, used with permission, https://www.facebook.com/paintwithlightphoto.

​I Was Never the Same After That...

A Midwife’s Story of Transformation, Loss, and Healing​
I've been caring for midwifery clients for more than 10 years now. After undergoing a major life change, I will never be the same.

This season has cracked something wide open in me—not in a way that destroyed me, but in a way that revealed who I truly am.

Midwifery called to me during a time when I was reordering my entire life. What began as a practical step toward a new profession soon became a deeply spiritual journey. I eventually joined a group practice and served faithfully there, growing in skill and confidence. But after some time, I returned to private practice, where I could more intimately honor the values that matter most to me—autonomy, sisterhood, and reverence for the divine nature of womanhood.

In the midst of building this sacred work, life took me to my knees.

In less than a year's time, I lost my mother, one of my brothers, and my father. Each loss felt like a wave crashing over me, pulling me under just as I had begun to find my footing again. At the same time, I am a caregiver to my husband, a veteran who carries wounds that are not always visible. I give all I have, and when that ran out, I gave more. There were days I didn’t know how I would make it through.

And then, just as I thought I was finding a rhythm again, I suffered a serious fall—one that nearly cost me the range of motion in my dominant arm. For someone whose hands are her tools, her ministry, and her livelihood, it was devastating.

But I’ve learned that healing doesn’t always come the way we expect.

Out of that pain, I was once again invited to transform. I turned inward. I turned upward. And I turned my attention to my own health—something I had long placed on the back burner while I served everyone else.

I changed my lifestyle. I addressed the root of my metabolic dysfunction. I began reversing insulin resistance. I have lost over 50 pounds as of this writing, reversed pre-diabetes, and brought my cholesterol levels back into the normal range—something I had never been able to accomplish on any diet I had ever tried after 30 years of being told my cholesterol was out of range.

But it’s not just about the numbers.

I’ve experienced relief from fibromyalgia symptoms that once ruled my days. The chronic sinusitis, the relentless migraines—I thought they were just part of my life forever. And yet, here I stand, clearer, lighter, and more vibrant than I have felt in years.

This healing journey has given me something priceless: hope. Not just for myself, but for every woman I serve.

Because I know now—deep in my bones—that we can heal. That wholeness is not a far-off dream, but a living possibility. That even when the world falls apart around us, even when we are brought low by grief, pain, or loss, we can rise. We can rebuild. And we can become someone stronger, gentler, and wiser on the other side.

Today, I still walk alongside women in their sacred seasons—from maiden to mother to matriarch—but I do so with a new heart. A heart that has been broken and re-mended. A heart that knows what it means to begin again. A heart that bears witness not only to the birth of babies, but to the rebirth of women—including myself.

If you’re ready to begin your own journey of healing, I invite you to explore my coaching work.
Together, we’ll uncover what’s possible for your health, your wholeness, and your future.